NSAW Recap, Season 2 Announcement, Public Speaking With A Stutter, and The Evolution of Speech Therapy

Transcript

Maya Chupkov:

Hi I'm Maya Chupkov and I'm a woman who stutters Welcome to proud stutter, a show about stuttering and embracing verbal diversity in an effort to change how we talk about it. one conversation at a time.

Welcome to another bonus episode of proud stutter. This one has two parts. First, I'll give a few updates about the show and season two. The second part will be a recap of National Stuttering Awareness Week, including a stripped down version of our panel discussion creating safe spaces for people who stutter. Quick reminder, everything we talk about in each episode of proud stutter can be found in the link in the show notes. Click it to find all the references including books, films, anything mentioned during the show. If you love the show and want to join the proud stutter community on a more intimate level, join the proud stutter membership program. Members of the proud stutter membership get one on one coaching sessions with me swag from our merch store, shout outs and more.

Not to mention proud stutter is entirely an independent podcast. So if you like what you hear, and if you want to be part of making sure this show is in your ears for years to come, head to ko-fi.com/proudstutter.com and join us. Thank you to some of our newest members of the membership program. Dustin wells, Joshua Compton and Lucy Reed. Thank you all so much. And thank you to everyone who is in the proud studded membership program.

And now let's get to today's bonus episode. So our first announcement is about season two. And I am so excited to officially announce the launch date for proud stutter season two. So we are launching Season Two right after the National Stuttering Association Conference. Our launch date is Friday July 8 2022. And the theme for season two is transformative experiences. I will be joined by a different co host who does not stutter for each episode. To maintain the show's commitment to expanding ally ship. There'll be interviews with people who stutter and the transformative experiences. That's the breakthroughs the crises, transfiguration that have shaped their stuttering journey, the life altering moments. If you're interested in being on the show or being a co host, please email me at info at proud stutter.com. And that's it for the updates about the show. For now.

It's time to recap National Stuttering Awareness Week. I can't believe it's already been two weeks. Since that eventful week. It was quite an exciting week. The celebration started the week before with a press conference with the Bay Area stuttering community. And Supervisor Dean Preston and Rafael Mandelman of the San Francisco Board of Supervisors were in attendance. Dean, who helped us with our local resolution spoke a few words. San Francisco is now one of the first cities in the country to pass a local resolution to recognize National Stuttering Awareness Week. The press conference was such a powerful experience. Being able to share the podium with my stuttering community in the Bay Area just felt it's felt so amazing. And for many of us, it was the first time speaking openly about our stutter in such a public way. It was beautiful to see people sharing their stories. There were tears there were laughs and it was just a very, really a very transformational experience for myself. More good news. The resolution ended up passing unanimously the following week during actual National Stuttering Awareness Week. And really this is just getting me so excited to help other cities pass similar resolutions. I'm already working with a few cities right now to try to get recognition for their communities. The next opportunity is international Stuttering Awareness Day. And that's every year on October 22. This year it's going to be a Saturday, and the stuttering community in Denver, Colorado reached out and now we're working on a local resolution for international Stuttering Awareness Day. If you are interested in doing something similar in your community, please email me at info at proud center.com And check out our show notes. For all the amazing awesome media coverage. We got so many articles around stuttering and lifting up the voices of people who stutter.

So after the press conference proud stutter hosted two events including stutter trivia night, and a panel event featuring Mariam Elba and Mike meany from season one, a proud stutter and Dr. Rick herder. The last part of this episode features a podcast version of the conversation creating safe spaces for people who stutter, the full conversation can be found on our YouTube page proud stutter. So here we go. Let's dive in to our conversation.

Can you describe your connection to stuttering?

Mariam Elba:

My connection to stuttering now is that I think I learned a lot of things from my stutter. I think it teaches me to be patient with myself. If it if it if if, if my stutter is severe in a particular situation. I'm, I'm, I've like, learned to kind of give myself time when I need it both in my speech and kind of outside the realm of my of my speech. And I think also, as people who stutter we have, we have the chance to also be teachers in that way where we kind of like, have like, where we're like, we're like, we might encourage others to be a patient, like not just patient with us, but like, you know, to kind of slow down and take our time. Like with our speech and also just with, like everyday routine things that might be similar to speech.

Mike Meaney:

Thanks a lot for your answer. Maryam and a lot of what you said resonates with me, I think my stutter used to be much more pronounced. And actually, M's are the hardest sound for me to say, it's Mike meanies my name. And I was really unlucky. For school when I had to introduce myself every day. Or at least at the start of the school year. It's quite mild now. And I'm not sure if it's mild, because all of the techniques that I developed over the course of my life to hide my stutter are just so added and ingrained in how I think and operate. You know, very small things like tapping my feet and flicking my hands and turning my head and all these little things that I use to unblock myself and you know, just learning a lot of words and sort of always having this like repository of phrases and different ways to say what I was going to say. And it's it's quite mild now. But I, my connection to it is like it's still a very core part of my identity. And like, in some ways I i understand it as like a very central defining feature of who I am and like my life,

Dr. Rick Herder:

I have taught public speaking in more or less, you know, regular fashion for close to four decades. And for most of that time, seeing I was coaching, I was coaching High School speakers on the speech team. I was occasionally take teaching public speaking in my classes, and then for about a decade taught that as a big part of my load as a high school teacher. And through all of those years teaching, teaching students public speaking. I never had students who stuttered in my class, at least from my perspective, you know, I didn't have students who stuttered in my classroom and other people with other professionals who are doing the same In Job reported similar things. Now, of course, over the years, I had an occasional student I remember one student, my second or third year of speaking whom we referred to a to the speech language pathologists on staff. And that student who to me seemed obviously the stutter came back and said, No, no, no, they said, I don't have a stutter. And so I just had these really ambiguous, few ambiguous confusing experiences with it. And it's obvious now that a lot that that there were students in my classroom, she was in classrooms who stuttered. But they were clearly hiding in plain sight. And when Carl, my son, Carl became a speech language pathologist, you know, works for the American Institute of stuttering, and he's a board certified stuttering specialist. And when he and as I began to learn alongside my son, and he and I began to do some, some research on this and gather the stories of students who stuttered, what I came to realize was that those students were there all the time. And when I started talking in my classrooms, the first day, about ADA accommodations, and, and I talked to them about just what stuttering is, and said, and gave them some basic facts on it and said, you know, if you live with this, you know, please, you know, you don't have to hide in my classroom, we can talk about this, and I'll and I will do my best to make appropriate accommodations. And suddenly, students started coming out of the woodwork, they started stepping out of the shadows. And there weren't a lot, but, you know, in terms of, but I think that probably every semester, I would have a couple of students who had who had stepped forward, which had a very small university, such as the one where I teach, that's a significant number. And I got to know a number of those students quite well. And we can talk more about some of the things that have have occurred in regard to making those accommodations. But I want to stress a couple of things. One is that in my campus, you know, in our Department of Communication or Communication Studies program, rather, we put a disability statement on all of our syllabi, and we make sure that students know that if if they are living with a stutter, or any other disability, that they can go to Disability Services and request and request appropriate accommodations. But I'm really sad to report I just double checked this afternoon, just to make sure that I that I have this, that my information was up to date. But the National Communication Association is the professional organization to which people like naval on people who study communication in general, and people who teach public speaking, most of them are going to be members of the National Communication Association. And on their main website, they have a page where they offer representative syllabi from all the various sub disciplines. And so I looked again today, and they had nine sample syllabi posted up there for public speaking. They had four sample syllabi up there for coursework for methodology courses for people who are planning to become language arts teachers and and to be certified to teach public speaking on the secondary level. And of those nine syllabi that were there, my my count right now 13 syllabi total of those 13 syllabi, and that one included a disability statement. And so I'm very proud of my organization of the organization to which I belong, the National Communication Association for the leadership they have shown in any number of various in regard to human rights. Unfortunately, however, we're not doing we're not showing leadership in this area. And there's a whole history to the relationship between speech language pathology, and Communication Studies. And we can talk about a little bit of that if you're interested. But I will say that, for our part, Carl and I have been doing some, some work and we're hoping to publish some things that might help to move our discipline along a little bit and help them to become aware of the need for training. People who are going to be teaching public speaking and making appropriate accommodations for those who stutter.

Maya:

You know, like that really calls to my memory I have from college when I was I got my minor and Professional Writing. And part of that under the writing umbrella of programs that there was a public speaking class. And it was with one of my favorite teachers, and I was so excited for it. And at the last minute, I just decided I, I just dropped out because I, as much as I wanted to, like, learn how to become a public speaker, and I love talking on a mic, like, I've just since I was little, I've just always had this like, urge to like, grab a mic and start like singing or talking. And I'm just like, that's always been something I just have thrived for. And I've had this like, pull towards and so but then I just dropped out the last minute because I was like, I don't want to put myself through two days a week to having to like go up in front of a crowd and like, do a speech like that just seem like torture in a way because I'd have to constantly just work extra hard to like, make sure my stutter didn't come out. And so, and in hindsight, you would have been very understanding. But it's like, there's that step. I think that's missing that disconnect of like, sometimes this like, like, if I would have seen something like either in a syllabus or something that would have made me feel more safe and comfortable. Maybe I would have taken that class. And so yeah, I think it's wonderful what you're doing, Rick, and there, there's just I think there's a huge opportunity, like I'm even thinking like a petition of some sort to, like really try to get as many public speaking teachers as as possible to like, commit to having those statements, I did kind of want to talk more about the relationship between public speaking and being a person who stutter, because it definitely has lots to do with this theme of safe spaces. And so, Mike, I wanted to, I want to ask you, like, I know you, you've done a lot of public speaking, but what was so different about speaking at the rally at City Hall last week, for you,

Mike:

I think what was so powerful and so different about City Hall is that I've never shared the stage with other people who stuttered. And like, it was really beautiful just to see everyone walk in and sort of own their, their, their space and on their voice. And to know that like how they were going to speak was not going to be unusual and different from how other people were, but it was going to be the norm. And I just, it was just so inspiring to share and the courage of of everyone who was there. And then to have a public leader like Dean Preston and others there in support. I mean, it was, it was phenomenal. I mean, I've never experienced something like that. And yeah, it just, it's hard to express how meaningful it is. And it's like, the podium and the microphone are like, the things of nightmares for stutter, right? Like, these are things that like, you know, that's like the weird stuff that pops up in my dream still, right? It's like a microphone and a podium. And there we were, like, seven of us just like, rocking it. And it was so cool. And I just like wish my, you know, second grade self like could have seen that. So it was really special.

Maya:

Yeah, and that's why I want as many people as possible. I know, we're all at different stages in our journey. We're not all ready to like share our voices, and that's totally okay. But just the experience of being up there. As a person who stutters with others in the community. It really felt very safe up there because I if I stuttered, it's okay, I had my community literally standing behind me like it was like this out of body experience. And I want other people to like, tap into that power inside of them. And you know, whether it's it's whether it's passing a local Roof resolution and that their community and using that as a way to, like, get up on the podium, or, you know, telling your story. Like in any medium, it's just like the most. It's a very powerful way to just heal, I think because like, but at the same time, it's like it took me 29 years to be at this moment. I know not everyone is there and it takes time. And so I totally get that. But it's just like the feeling. I just, I hope everyone can experience it's one day. And I did want to open the space up to Patrick Meniboon? Is that how you say it?

Patrick Meniboon:

Yeah, let's go right. Everybody, Hello, my name is Patrick king. And I'm a business coach consultant. And it'll happen in a safe space. Public speaking is actually my safe space. And it'll bring a whole different approach to this because, like, you mentioned that each person is at a different stage. And my was more of getting to the point where I just got completely fed up, you know, with going home each night and putting my head in my hand and be be embarrassed that I started in from somebody I stood up in front of this girl, or I stood in front this person. And for some reason, one day, maybe 1516 Some years ago, I made a decision that I was going to let somebody else worry more of my salary than I will do. And I don't know what happened, whether it or not, what are your spiritual beliefs is something happened some kind of transformation happen. And my whole life just open up. Because it the way I approach it was more of like, you know, was like pretty much that I don't care animal What were you think I'm going to be me. And since then, I got into Toastmasters when to a speech contests, you know, against a guy who have been to the Toastmaster World Championship of purpose, speaking three times, and defeated a guy and came with in one contest win of going to the World Championship. And then I started to focus more on connection and confidence versus fluency. And that is where I you know, to be honest with you guys, I've been confused because it seemed that speech therapy focus so much of fluency, which, I don't know if that's the point. Like in my mind, it my goal is not to be fluid, and go is to be covenant, and connect. Because if I didn't start or I still have those two things I have to work through. And then with the fluency, I'm in a group with nice people having a conversation, and I have to be thinking about he's he onsets role on occasion, and get into another habit that I have to break. When my transformation startup look, I completely understand the situation we got. Personally, I was this guy who read in high school, I was the top of my class. And I almost skipped my own high school graduation because I was told that I was going to speak close to if it was not from from a school principal, I would have skipped my graduation. And when I look back on all those regrets, I just decided, let somebody else worry about it. And the point I want to make is to, you know, where is the sweet spot between advocacy and getting to the point where we master ourself and say, enough is enough. I'm going to be me and let somebody else worry about it.

Maya Chupkov:

Wow, thank you so much for sharing that that was extremely powerful and you know, that's it. That's honestly partly reason I started proud stutters because I was, I was fed up with people. I was just fed up with the feeling of just letting life letting my stutter stop me from doing what I really wanted to do. And that's like, sharing my voice and telling helping tell stories. And, you know, I have a story that I've been working on around being wanting to be a broadcast journalist that I did a reading last week at a book festival around this story. And it's just like, it's just a message that like, it's time that like, for me, like, I'm just sick of this, yeah, constant, over analyzation of myself. And I'm just going to tell my stories on my own terms, podcasting, because you literally anyone can start a podcast, anyone, there's no barrier there. There's no gatekeeper to tell me what to do. Like, I'm literally doing it on my own terms. And it's like the most amazing feeling. And I feel like you did something similar. And I just want to respond to the thing you said about speech pathology. And, you know, like, I've said this before, like, I had a traumatic experience when I was in speech therapy, it was 20 years ago. And the reason was, because, yes, it was a fluency type of speech therapy. But there are speech therapists out there that it's up to their client on what they want to work on. If they want to work on fluency then awesome if they want to work on just like goal setting and confidence building, and speaking openly. Like, that's okay. It's just, I think there's a lot of evolution and how speech therapy has transformed and I was, I was like that, too. I was like speech therapist, every time I thought about them. I like had this negative image in my brain. But as soon as I met the first speech therapists that kind of opened me up that there's other there's other ways to help people who stutter.

Carl Herder:

Since you're bringing it up. My I think it's important for me to jump in and just share that. Yeah. And Bailey Levis actually covered this, when you had him on your podcast, you know, the end of the season. But yeah, there's, there's been quite a movement among our profession. And we're little by little doing a better job of allowing speech therapy for stuttering to look a lot like talk therapy for stuttering. And it's, you know, we're learning to focus less on the easy on sets that Patrick was referring to, and the fluency driven driven. Results, orient fluency results oriented therapy and looking at people who stutter who are living this day to day and looking at the lived experience and trying to help people consider how they want to handle speaking in different situations. And I think that the work that we're learning to do, helps people to get from whatever state they're in, to where Patrick is at, you know, and I think one of the ways that we do this is we help people to advocate for themselves so that they can little by little create that safe space for themselves, so that they can feel more capable of being more authentically themselves in different environments, and more capable of speaking confidently whether it's in a public speaking classroom or, or a social setting, or everything in between, you know, and most of the speech language pathologist that I interact with regularly at the American Institute for stuttering and colleagues elsewhere, are doing therapy in a way now where it's it's actually rare for us to start with a speech technique. You know, a lot of folks are doing avoidance reduction therapy and cognitive restructuring and honestly sitting around talking about what it's like to stutter and how they're going to handle specific situations. You know, specific to like, like what Marian what you were saying about all of those little things that you figured out that people are actually pretty understanding if you're just asked for a little accommodation, you know, that people will provide those things and little by little, you know, you learn that you can you can feel more and more comfortable in the in the different speaking situations that you face. By taking on a little bit more you know, each time you face that situation,

Mariam:

I can I can chime in with a very brief last word that I think is like, you know, or like like that is like a Mm hmm. That is like a, a, a mantra to me when I'm, you know, kind of getting in my head when I'm in like middle of like a, of a of a of a stuttering on a block or in a very, you know, high pressure situation in front of people on the phone. You name it. Where, like, you know, and I think that that like, this is very similar to what Patrick brought up, but like, I, it's, it's important as a person who stutters, if you feel like you're taking up a lot of time trying to speak or if you're taking up a lot of like, a lot of like, someone's time, like, it's, it's important to kind of stray away from that mindset and instead like, embrace that you, like, deserve other people's time. You you, like might need more time than others to speak but, you know, it's, it's, it's the, it's the time that you need in order to get to, to, to who to communicate. So you have a right to that time.

Maya:

And that's it for this episode of proud stutter. This episode of proud stutter was produced and edited by me, Maya Chupkov. Our music was composed by a gusto, Denise, and our artwork by Maura zekiel and Noah Chupkov. If you have an idea or want to be part of a future episode, visit us at www dot proud stutter.com. And if you liked the show, you can leave us a review wherever you're listening to this podcast you want to leave us a voicemail, check out our show notes for that the number to call in more importantly, tell your friends to listen to until we meet again. Thanks for listening. Be proud and be you